"How are you feeling?" "I'm very tired."
The first words in Selena Gomez's Apple TV+ documentary, Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me, are uttered as the musician lies down in the backseat of her private car, glum and reluctant to take her morning meds. She's resting, but she's awake.
Gomez's journey from child actor to pop star has been revelatory, but it's also exhausted her wellbeing. The 96-minute film follows the singer-songwriter over the course of six years, focusing on her bipolar disorder diagnosis, lupus treatment, philanthropic ventures, touring during her Revival era, and more.
Although My Mind & Me embraces darkness, it's deeply rooted in Gomez's love of giving, and her gratitude for family and friends. As the documentary intimately unravels and rebuilds the musician's identity, Gomez comes into focus to remind us that there's always light at the end of the tunnel. Here are five key details we learned from watching Selena Gomez's new documentary, Selena Gomez: My Mind & Me.
Selena's Openness About Mental Health Has Helped Herself & Others
In musician documentaries, discussions about mental health are often just cursory chapters — slotted between paparazzi flashes and hoards of screaming fans. My Mind & Me, however, as its title indicates, takes viewers deep within Gomez's mind.
The documentary details Gomez's experience with bipolar disorder, depression and anxiety with startling candor — part and parcel of the singer's goal to destigmatize conversations about mental health. Gomez teases that viewers will become privy to her "darkest secrets" early on in the film, and she keeps her promise. She doesn't fleetingly discuss her mental health, but shows it, vividly and honestly.
"I have to stop living like this," reads one of Gomez's journal entries from Dec. 19, 2019, her smooth, loopy handwriting snaking across the screen in one of the documentary's creative motifs. Gomez acknowledges she needs change in her life, and by making this statement public in My Mind & Me, she embraces the power of asking for help — and encourages others to do the same.
Selena Wants To Appreciate Her Past, Not Be Defined By It
While it's difficult for Gomez to escape her Disney past, she still deeply values nostalgia. In My Mind & Me, the singer goes home to Texas, visiting her childhood house and high school where she reminisces about growing up. Viewers watch Gomez order at a drive-through, speak to students who sit in the desks that she used to sit in, and talk about her old crushes with her cousin and best friend, Priscilla Cosme.
These homey, sentimental scenes harshly contrast the documentary's earlier moments of anxiety, such as a scene following the final rehearsal for the Revival tour where Gomez fears disappointing her manager and being viewed as a "Disney kid."
The poignant scenes in Texas also vary in tone from the documentary's frequent references to the media's obsession with her former relationship with Justin Bieber, and discusses Gomez's desire to be recognized as an individual.
Gomez finds comfort in her attempt to understand the disparity between her past and present. My Mind & Me reveals how Gomez finds strength in recognizing that her old life isn't gone — it's just a part of her now.
"Lose You To Love Me" Is Her Magnum Opus
In 2019, Gomez was "ready to just say I'm sad." She texted collaborators Julia Michaels and Justin Tranter, and in 45 minutes, they had a song.
The fastest song Gomez has ever written, "Lose You To Love Me," became her first track to top the Billboard Hot 100. Though Gomez, surprisingly, doesn't discuss her music much in My Mind & Me, she does choose to highlight this ballad, as one of the truest reflections of herself as a person and an artist.
On the surface, the power ballad is about loss, but a deeper listen tells a story of discovery. "It's me learning to choose myself, to choose life," Gomez explains in My Mind & Me. The documentary's focus on mental health provides fuller context for the song's weight.
Unlike "Who Says" and "Let Me Get Me," which discuss self-love broadly and in a more traditional sense, My Mind & Me reveals how "Lose You To Love Me" is about finding inner peace and healing.
Selena's Mom Taught Her To Not Fear Life
Growing up in Texas, Gomez was scared of thunderstorms. But her mom gave her books that explained how lightning and thunder were natural. "[She] basically said, 'The more you learn about it, the less you're gonna be afraid of it,'" Gomez remembers in My Mind & Me. "And it really helped."
In her documentary, Gomez thanks many family members and friends for their support, but she emphasizes gratitude for her mother. Gomez's mom worked multiple jobs to help care for her daughter; that perseverance and courage inspired Gomez, who called her mother a "powerful spirit" who showed her how to face life.
The strength Gomez's mother demonstrated helped the singer in her daily battles with lupus and bipolar disorder. The documentary details how Gomez must relearn how to live with these health conditions, and is buoyed by her mother and support system. By surrounding herself with people who never gave up on her, Gomez found faith in herself.
Selena Has Found Purpose In Connection, Not Escapism
Gomez first discovered the concept of escapism when she was 7 years old during her first job on "Barney & Friends." But as Gomez continued to excel in the entertainment industry, she found that there was little relief from her own vanity and loneliness.
As much as My Mind & Me shows the extraordinary external and internal pressure Gomez experiences, the documentary also reveals how deep connections have brought her joy. Amid the myriad struggles resulting from fame, close relationships have helped tether Gomez to reality.
The documentary highlights Gomez's philanthropic visit to Kenya, where she met local students in coordination with WE Charity. Gomez's eyes light up as she speaks with youth about their education, goals and more — "Do you believe in love?" she even asks at one point.
"Part of my heart is still in Kenya," she says in the film, inspired to continue advocacy work. Whether it's through advocating for education or mental health, My Mind & Me depicts how the singer finds a sense of purpose through giving back.